Welcome To My Life
by lime 63
Summary: But now I need someone here to come save me. I’m lying here, feeling my blood leak out around me. I may not be able to see the blood, but I can smell it, and I can taste it. These salty tears and that iron blood, what a horrible taste to die to.
1. Chapter 1

A/N:Song fic, to "Welcome to My Life" by simple plan

The story flows best if you listen to the song, while you read the story

Warning: character angst, previous deaths reffered to

* * *

Welcome to my life, what's left of it

It's over now.

The battle's done.

Voldemort's dead.

I'm dying.

He stabbed me though the back with Slytherin's sword.

We were fighting to the death.

No magic,

Just swords,

Just us.

No one else; just us. That's my downfall, but it was necessary. If his people had been here, they would have interfered, and I would have died. Sooner.

But now I need someone here. I need someone to come save me. I'm lying here, feeling my blood leak out around me. I may not be able to see the blood, but I can smell it, and I can taste it.

These salty tears and that iron blood, what a horrible taste to die to.

I don't want to die.

I'm still young.

You all put me up to this. The Wizarding World's "Chosen One". All the glory and fame any one ever wanted. More death than anyone should ever see.

I don't want fame; I don't want glory; I don't want death; and I don't want this pain.

Just make the pain go away. I can't stand the pain.

What right did you have to make me do this? You don't know what it's like to see your friends fall around you; you don't know what it's to never have known your family, to have to make your family, but anytime someone joins, another one dies.

_Do you ever feel like breaking down?_

_Do you ever feel out of place?_

_Like somehow you just don't belong, and no one understands you?_

_Do ever wanna run away, _

just leave everything behind and just run, run forever

_Do you lock yourself in your room, with the radio on turned up so loud, that no one hears you screaming? _

And I screamed a lot. There was too much pain; there was nothing I could do

_No you don't know what it's like, when nothing feels alright_

_You don't know what it's like to be like me_

_To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in the dark_

_To kicked when you're down, to feel like you've been pushed around_

_To be on the edge of breaking down, but no one's there to save you_

_No, you don't know what it's like_

_Welcome to my life_

I've been hurt so much. I don't know how much more kicking my bones can take before they shatter. If only there was someone here to help me, to even know that I needed help.

But no one's coming, no one cares. The villain is dead; nobody cares about the hero anymore.


	2. Chapter 2

Some one came.

Someone saved me.

I don't know who it was.

All I saw was a tall man in black robes and I was scared.

I thought another one of them was back to hurt me more.

But he didn't.

He picked me up and told me that everything would be alright.

I couldn't recognize his voice, I was too tired.

All I remember was darkness and more pain.

* * *

I woke up I was in St. Mungo's.

No one knew who brought me here, I came in amongst the other casualties and no one recognized me until he was long gone.

I wish I knew who he was.

I wish I could thank him for saving me

I wish I could ask him why he cared

But now that I know I can live, I need to know something else.

Do I want to?


	3. Chapter 3

Because of the many casualties in the war, I am now officially a ward of the Ministry.

Everyone who would _really_ want me is dead.

Everyone: all the Weasleys, all of the Order, Dumbledore; everyone.

Just a few more months until I'm officially my own person and can leave this place.

I wanted emancipitation, I can take care of myself; I Killed the Dark Lord, for god's sake but no. I need more protection and since I'm a minor with no official (or unofficial) guardian, I have no choice.

I now live with the Minister of Magic

God, kill me now.

I would gladly have died back on the battlefield never to have been in these politics. Everyone smiles and asks if I'm happy the war is over.

Yes I'm happy it's over, I smile back and say.

But I feel the opposite

There is nothing and no one left for me here. I wish I was with my friends and family,

Wherever they may be


	4. Chapter 4

I was brought to a press conference today.

The Minister's wife laid out my best robes and told be to wash my face. I'm not 2.

The conference was awful.

You were all was happy that He was dead, that all his people are gone. You were all smiling and laughing.

You still won't say his name.

You're still too scared.

I'm not scared.

I'm not much anymore, just hollow.

I miss everyone who cared about _who_ I was, not _what_ I am

I want those people back, not you, not this crowd of reporters

_Do you wanna be be somebody else, are you sick of feeling so left out_

That's how I feel now. I wish someone else had this glory, this fame.

I wish that I had my friends; that I knew my parents; that I was happy

_Are you desperate to find something more, before your life is over?_

_Are you stuck inside a world you hate?_

_Are you sick of everyone around, with the big fake smiles and stupid lies, while deep inside you're bleeding?_

_No you don't know what it's like, when nothing feels alright_

_You don't know what it's like to be like me_

You won't go away. You won't leave me alone. I went for a walk, and there were 50 of you who staring at me as I turned the corner. Before I got back to the Minister's house, your reporters were swarming me, wanting to talk to me.

I ran.

I can't talk to you.

You don't care about me, you just want something to print.

I wish I could find the one person who cared enough to save me.

Why hasn't he came forward?

There have been enough stories about him, he'd be famous.

Maybe, he's like me.

Maybe he doesn't want fame.

Maybe he's dead.

* * *

A/N: some one needs to let me know if they want the end of this story


	5. Chapter 5

_To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in the dark_

_To kicked when you're down, to feel like you've been pushed around_

_To be on the edge of breaking down, but no one's there to save you_

_No, you don't know what it's like_

_Welcome to my life_

God knows I've broken so much. All the tears I've cried. All the blood I've shed, my arms will be forever scarred.

_No ever lied straight to your face_

_No ever stabbed you in the back_

_You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be OK_

_Everybody always gave you what you wanted, you never had to work it was always there_

_You don't know what it's like, what it's like,_

Everyone lies to me. You all tell me it'll be alright

You print lies about how wonderful I am; how I'm such a good saviour; how I'm so _happy._

You all had your happiness given to you, by me. No more daemons to fight, no more random deaths for me. I hope you're all happy.

I don't even remember what happy is anymore.

_To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in the dark_

_To kicked when you're down, to feel like you've been pushed around_

_To be on the edge of breaking down, but no one's there to save you_

_No, you don't know what it's like_

He's not coming

Whoever saved me from my death won't save me from my life.

I don't want my life anymore.

You all can have it.

Just a little while longer, then my life is all yours


	6. Chapter 6

Some poisons are instant

Some take years

One takes twenty four hours

Just enough time to tell the world goodbye

A glass bottle smashed to the floor as a body staggered with pain.

* * *

I need to finish things. I only have a few hours left.

Then I'll take the sleeping potion so I won't feel the pain.

I will never wake up.

But first, to Gringotts, to make sure all of my fortune goes somewhere worthwhile and not to you politicians

You never know what it's like

_To be hurt, to feel lost, to be left out in the dark_

* * *

My will is done. Most of the money went to two places.

_The Remus Lupin foundation for werewolves._

They will now have a safe place to live, help finding a job, a lawyer when needed, and wolfsbane and a safe house on the full moon.

Most of my money went there, but there is so much of it that it should never run.

The foundation should run purely off of the interest of the account, you will never be broke.

It's the most that I can do to remember him as he was, who he was and not just as his torn body was mutilated and eaten.

I hope that you can all remember him when I am gone. He deserves it.

_Padfoot's help for magical kids._

So no magical kid ever has to go through what I did at the Dursley's.

They also have a record of all muggleborn children to meet with their parents when they are little to explain things.

It will be much more useful than a vague letter on your eleventh birthday.

Because you never understand what it's like

_To kicked when you're down, to feel like you've been pushed around_

And no child should ever have to feel as unwanted or alone as I do.

It's time to go back to the Minister's now.

It's getting late and my vision is going fuzzy.

I have 5 hours left, and they will _hurt_ if I don't get that potion soon.

I'm much weaker then I thought, my steps are wobbly and I'm too disoriented to Apparate.

I'll Floo from the Leaky Cauldron. It will take a bit to go through the security to get into the house, but I need that potion soon and Apparating would be messy.

Almost there; just 100 more feet.

One foot in front of the other

I can't move straight

You are all staring at me.

Stop staring, none of you care

There was only one thing as I saw as my world swam to into darkness.

All I saw was a tall man in black robes and I was relieved.


	7. Chapter 7

I hate white walls

I hate while beds

I hate scratchy white sheets

I quickly realized that I was in St. Mungo's and everything was white.

There was one thing that was not white:

A tall man in black robes, with greasy hair. This man I was intimately familiar with.

"Potter."

"Yes Professor?"

"Why are you such an imbecile that not only was I forced to save you from the battle field, but yet again in the Middle of Diagon alley in broad daylight?"

I had nothing to say to that.

Why had he saved me? This man had always hated me, why did he feel the need to continue my life?

Probably to torture me.

"No Potter, not to torture you."

"I didn't mean to say that aloud"

"Then why did you?"

"Because my brain feels fuzzy, my tongue feels loose and my arms feel light."

The snarky git, actually looked…_ amused?_

I did not know he could feel anything but disdain.

"That would be the potions you are under."

"What!? Why?"

"Because you were poisoned. Probably while you were sleeping. Because of the obvious lack of effective security, you are being removed from the minister's home. Some stupid bureaucratic idiot decided that you would be safer with me."

Shit, just…

Shit.

Not only do I have to live, but I have to live with _him._

"Why did you save me?"

"The first time or the second time that your stupidity overtook you and you decided it would be fun to die?"

SHIT, he knows. He can't know. It must have been his twisted sense of humour

If he knew he would have told someone. They would have done something. He Can't know

"Both"

He appeared nonplused for a second. The he hesitantly responded

"Because you are to young to have had those experiences. You deserve a chance to live a normal life. Everything that has happened to you so far has been the Dark Lord's fault or an accident. One is dead and the other is fate. We all deserve a chance to rise above fate."

Good god! The grease ball is serious!

"It is funny how accidents control our lives, your life.

After being stabbed in the back, you _accidentally_ got placed in the Minister's house for security.

Then someone who wanted you dead _accidentally_ got passed this security and poisoned you.

Because of the alcohol you drank last night, don't look so surprised your blood tests showed it, you took an anti-nausea potions which means you _accidentally_ felt fine and did not feel the symptoms of the poison.

I was _accidentally_ on the street at the same time that your potion wore off and you collapsed."

His sense of humour is not at all appreciated, so much for being serious.

I can't believe I have to _live,_ with him.

I just want this pain to go away.

My body is not sore, but my soul is.

I just want to be with people who care, no matter where they are

The one who I though cared enough to save me did it by _accident._

"Never the less, I am now stuck with you. The Healers say that you will be out of here in five days; I will be back then."

He turned to leave but paused for a second.

"Unless, knowing your luck there could be a mistake with your medicines. How tragic it would be if this _accident _was an instant poison instead of a pain reliever."

I never saw any part of him move. I never saw anyone as still as he was then.

"Goodbye Potter."

He walked out.

* * *

I never saw him move, but there it was.

Sitting on my bedside table was a tiny glass bottle filled with a thick green liquid.

There wasn't much there, just a swallow.

A swallow is all that's needed.

I reached for the bottle, and held it in my hand.

The glass was cool and I could hear the poison sloshing around inside.

I reach for the stopper in a trance and pull it out.

As I put the bottle to my lips, I can't believe that Snape would do this for me.

I pause, _Snape._

Despite how much we hate each other he has done so much for me lately.

He has already saved me twice and now has saved me by helping me to die.

Once I swallow this, it will all be over. My life will be done.

And you will know instantly because of all the monitoring spells I am under.

You will just assume that the assassin who poisoned be last time finally succeeded.

Snape was the only one here.

He didn't try to kill me; I did.

He's helped me, I can't make him take the blame for this.

I have to let you know what you did.


	8. Epilogue

10 minutes later, in the Healer's section down the hall, the alarms started blaring.

Those alarms only when off when a patients breathing and heart rate stopped.

After a _very_ quick check, it was deduced that the alarms went off in Room 21.

The room of the hospital's most famous patient.

The Healer on duty took off running down the hall.

* * *

He saw a peaceful, but dead, Potter.

He saw broken glass on the floor.

He smelt poison.

He suspected foul play .

He quickly called the auror's after checking the smell of the broken glass.

He recognized the instant poison.

He though it was a shame that Potter would have had no chance to scream for help.

He didn't see the innocent peace of parchment lying on the bedside table. A piece of parchment that had not been there before.

The aurors saw the piece of parchment directly after arriving in the room.

The first one read it; he dropped it to the floor.

The second one read it and just held it in astonishment.

They were both thinking the same thought:

"What the hell have we all done?"

* * *

Dear "Wizarding World",

You don't know what it's like

_To be on the edge of breaking down, but no one's there to save you_

_No, you don't know what it's like_

_Welcome to my life_

That has always been my life

You all put me up to this. I'm the Wizarding World's "Chosen One". All the glory and fame any one ever wanted. More death than anyone should ever see.

I don't want fame; I don't want glory; I don't want to see death; and I don't want this pain.

What right did you have to make me do this? You don't know what it's like to see your friends fall around you; you don't know what it's to never have known your family, to have to make your family, but anytime someone joins, another one dies.

I've been hurt so much. I don't know how much more bruising and abuse my soul can take before it shatters. But no one's coming to help me heal, no one is around who cares. The villain is dead; nobody truly cares about the hero anymore.

You all smile and ask if I'm happy the war is over.

Yes I'm happy it's over, I smile back and say.

But I feel the opposite

There is nothing and no one left for me here. I will be with my friends and family, wherever they may be. I miss everyone who cared about who I was, not what I am. Soon I will be with them.

There was one person who cared enough to save me. He saved me twice before and now he's saved me again. He's saved me from you.

You don't care about me, you just want something to print.

Print this letter. See how you all feel after reading this.

_Welcome to my Life_

* * *

A/N: This story was going to be much shorter. I was just going to stop at chapter 5, with all of the confusion that he was feeling, and let you draw your own conclusions. However, I got a review asking who his savior was. I knew who it was, and I wanted you to know too,so I wrote more tonight. They might be writen a lot differently. I was under a lot of stress and freaking out when I wrote the first 5 chapters. Now it's summer break and I've spent time with my friends and my boyfried. It's hard to write conving angst if your not feeling it at the time, but I tired my best. I hope it worked out alright and that you enjoyed the story. Let me know what you think please.


End file.
